Story highlights Often, by the time a couple comes to therapy, underlying causes have led to more trouble Common topics include infidelity, sex, money and major life changes Ian Kerner is a licensed couples therapist, writer and contributor on the topic of sex for CNN. (CNN)I'm often asked when couples should consider therapy. It's common for one partner to be unhappy, feel disconnected or feel that their needs for intimacy aren't being met. But rather than communicate about it, that partner may open up a metaphorical window with someone else and begin an affair. By the time the couple comes to therapy, the affair itself becomes the main topic, and its underlying causes are often ignored. The same scenario rings true for other sources of contention, from financial disagreements to sexual concerns. It's clear that couples shouldn't wait until they're in crisis mode to come to therapy, but what should they do? When is the right time to see a therapist? Couples should … [Read more...] about When is it really time for couples therapy?
Why is couple therapy good
Following questions & answers are written to help you gain a better understanding about couple therapy.What is couple therapy? Couple therapy means resolving problems and conflicts that happened on a couple. Couple therapy focuses on the problems existing in the relationship between couples. Not all couples are married. The term couples therapy is preferred to marriage counseling, marital therapy, or two people who love each other.What factors that influence a couple's relationship? Many factors can influence couples relationship & cause couples problems. The factors can come from inner or outer couple. The inner factors that influence couples relationship such us: abuse of alcohol and/or drugs sexual dissatisfaction illness etc. The outer factors that influence couples relationship such us:frequent job changes problem in office problem in community etc. How do I know if I should see a therapist? If you have some couple problems and cannot solve it, you need a therapist. … [Read more...] about FAQ on Couple Therapy
Good communication is the key to happy relationships among other things. It is unfortunate that the divorce rate in the United States and worldwide too is on the rise. Couples therapy is aimed at resolving the problem between husband and wife so that they can lead a happy life devoid of serious conflicts and heated arguments. The therapist or the psychologist help the couple identify problem and suggest behavior and other amendments so that both partners are contented. Couples therapy is blend of education, mediation and psychotherapy.The quality of communication between couples is the most crucial factor that distinguishes happy marriages from unhappy ones. The ability to communicate well also is the best indicator of relationship satisfaction and stability over time. In other words, the number of problems, individual personality traits or differences of opinion has nothing to do with happy or unhappy marriages. Instead, it is how couples talk about their problems and differences. … [Read more...] about Couples Therapy and Happy Marriages
When to Seek TreatmentI recently received a call from a woman who was interested in couple therapy.She and her partner were planning a wedding and thought it would be a good idea to have pre-marital counseling "to iron out a few problems". After a few months in treatment, they agreed that the work they accomplished benefited them as a couple and as individuals. They felt ready to begin the next chapter in their lives.I offer this example because it is so different from what I usually see.In my work with couples I have found---whether they are lesbian, gay, or straight---that by the time the couple comes to treatment, they are unable to talk to each other without fighting. Communication has broken down and their relationship is tense, volatile, and destructive. It is rare for couples to reach out for treatment unless they are desperate and therapy becomes a last ditch effort before breaking up.It is difficult to move forward in a relationship when anger and resentment have built up to … [Read more...] about Couple Therapy For Lesbian and Gay Men
Have you heard about John Gottman? Perhaps you read about him in Malcolm Gladwell's Blink! book.John Gottman is a famous psychologist at the University of Washington. He developed a model that can predict if couples can live together happily, or will remain dissatisfied in their relationship and break apart.Amazingly, his system predicts whether couples will break up with striking accuracy.His research forms the successful basis for a method of counseling for couples, straight or gay, married or unmarried. We will explore a few of his discoveries in this article.The four horsemen of apocalypse in a relationshipCouples in trouble usually have one or more of what Gottman calls 'the four horsemen of apocalypse' in their relationship.These arecriticism, contempt, stonewalling, and defensiveness. On the other hand, respect and affection are positive things which strengthen relationships.Gottman's system views the percentage of interactions between partners that involve "the four … [Read more...] about Couples Therapy and John Gottman’s Approach – Can They Help Create a Healthy Marriage?